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 A random story.

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ultimate_cloud
Ninja
ultimate_cloud


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue3/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (3/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: A random story.   A random story. EmptySat Feb 02, 2008 1:07 pm

{It doesn't even have a name yet. Ethan read the first page, but that's as far as anyone has seen. Any and all ideas/ revisions/ anything else will be greatly appreciated.}

I stood, my hands by my side, in the back of the room, leaned against one of the cold steel walls, listening to our leader call us up one after the other to bark out his orders in a monotone manner. That was, until Christina was called up. A chill came over the room, and a silence which was most unwelcoming fell. Even I was so tense that my fist clenched tightly enough to force sound from my leather gloves. As he spoke a devilish grin befell our leaders face. “you are to kill Adalina;s family.” His words struck everyone deep, but especially Christina. I noticed a hint of anguish in her eyes as she, in a rather murmured way uttered “Si…Sir…Wh…Why kill her family?” His smirk grew deeper, darker, and his next few words angered me deeply. “Because if you don’t you and your family shall meet the same fate.” I pushed myself from the wall, and came to rest on the platform just beside our leader. As I did I felt the black symbols begin to emerge on my skin, due to the rage induced build of energy I now began. “Adalina was like a sister to me just as Christina is. She disobeyed one…one of your corrupt orders, and you killed her for it! You call yourself a leader? Now her death isn’t enough, and instead of doing it yourself you would have Christina do your most deranged work and kill Adalina’s family too? You can’t even be called human!” As I spoke everyone else sat and watched in amazement. Christina had moved so that I was between her and our once denounced leader. I could feel it as she shuddered almost afraid, and reached to her arm to reassure her things would be alright. I watched as our once renowned leaders grin faded into a rather dismayed look. “You challenge me…your leader…knowing that I am stronger than you, and for what that insect?” He said gesturing toward Christina. “ I once thought you to be a wise man, but you are no more than a fool. I shall teach you as I taught that worthless imbecile Adalina.” I felt the familiar glow from the symbols on my body, now a rather deep bright green. I lunged at our once reveled leader out of pure anguish, forcing my fist through the air, leaving a green stream of light in it’s path. That once denounced leader of ours Rein, transferred his weight to his back foot, and leaned under my fist, his long blonde hair rustling slightly from the force of the punch. He leapt, first pushing with his forward most foot, as to alleviate some weight from his back foot before lifting it from the ground. Whilst still in the air he set his hands into motion, making hand signs, and after just a moment landed. He held both his hands forward launching a blast of energy from them. The energy was a rather dark blue, and crescent shaped as it flew through the air. I held up my hand, forming a green ellipse just in front of my palm. As the energy made contact with my ellipse I formed the ellipse around the energy, encasing it in a small orb. I drew my outstretched arm back to about my hip, then forced it forward, launching the orb toward Rein. I aimed a little lower this time, more towards his stomach, and it was just enough so that he didn’t have time to dodge. He did however have just enough time to pull his blade from his sheath with the distinct sound of metal engraving into wood. He rushed his blade up, and knocked the projectile away from himself, but toward organization members. I quickly collapsed my orb in on it’s self, as to avoid hitting anyone not already involved in this fight. I began to realized that if this fight remained here other people would be dragged into this. I felt Christina behind me again shudder just a little, and knew she probably had the same thoughts running through her head. I said just loud enough to make sure Christina could hear me “Stay here.” I said it with as much confidence as I possibly could, trying not to worry her any further, and then before she had time to reply dove toward Rein. I formed a small brace of bright green energy in front of my now outstretched hands, ready for him to guard with his sword. Just as I expected, he did. As the brace and his blade came together the brace came to a stop, and I forced my momentum upward, Flipping over Rein as he still struggled to hold of the brace’s momentum. As I sailed over his head I brought two rope like green streams of energy connecting to the brace with me. I made it past the point where Rein stood, still a good distance above him, and as I did I crossed the two green strands and pulled them taunt, forming an X on his back, and locking his hands against his chest. As I came to rest upon the ground I pivoted around my left foot so that my back was to Rein, and then pulled the two strands down over my shoulder. I felt the strain as I began to lift him, and bent to the side, using my hip to generate the required force used to send him sailing over my shoulder. I released the energy, and both the bright green brace, and strands disappeared just as Rein smashed into the wall. He hit with such force that the wall buckled a bit. It was evident that he was slightly impressed into the wall. Before gravity could take hold of his body pulling him to the ground I forced myself forward, quickly closing the short distance between myself and that monster, tearing my knee into the swell of his back with unimaginable force. It was enough to force him through the metal wall he was at rest in, and carry us both outside away from Christina and the rest of the organization. I came down with my right foot braced forward, my back leg bent a little behind me. I slid about three feet and then came to rest. Rein on the other hand smashed the ground on his side, rolling a bit before slamming his sword into the ground to bring himself to a stop. He used his sword as leverage to stand, and looked at me with an intensely irate expression. “ You do realize what this mean don’t you Jenn?” The monster spoke almost too confidently. “I’m going to have to kill you now, and I’m going to do it as slowly and painfully as I possibly can.”
    My skin was on fire. The symbols all over me were eating away at my flas h. I was already tired, somewhat out of breath. I knew Rein was stronger than me. He stood looking down upon me, on one knee, almost as if now, though I hated him, I was still kneeling before him. And even through all of it, I stood up. As I did I kept my face to the ground for a moment, and let my hand slide across the handle of the sword at my side, just to make sure it was still there. I clenched my fists as tightly as I could, wrenching yet still more sound from my now somewhat scorched leather glaves. I raised my eyes to Reains, and as I did couldn't help but smile. "I never really liked you Rein. You came of as such as nice guy. Not just to me, but to everyone. You acted as a friend to us. Drew us in to YOUR organization with promises of better things, of people who would accept us for who we were. Of course we followed you. We all felt like we were the outcasts of the world before we came together, and even now I thank you for that. For bringing us all together. Of course before we were allowed to see any other part of the organization we had to go through the screening process, isn't that what you called it? To make sure we didn't have any health issues or anything of the such? It seemed to make so much sense to me seeing as how I just came in from the street, but it wasn't screening at all was it Rein? You tormented us, all of us. Trying your best to create a perfect fighter, the perfect member, but you know what? Through all the torment you only helped to bring us all together even more. The things that made us so different let us know we all had to endure the same pain." I raised my hand up, my palm facing the sky to make sure that monster got a good look at the symbols eating away at me. "You made us a family Rein, and at first you were part of it to, but you've burned all your bridges now. Through the sick and tormented missions you began sending us on after a period of time. At first they too made since. We were like vigalanties, killing the oppressors about the world. But after a while, you had us commiting senseless murder. We however had so much faith in you that we were blind until only a short period ago, when you had a member killed. That was the light. the light that showed us how dark a group we had become, and the light that showed us the darkness within you."
"Enough! I do so enjoy your speeches Jenn. Giving so much insight into the world around you. It really does deserve an applause." Rein began to calk toward me, his hands in front of him,clapping, his sword still stuck in the ground a good ways. "But..." Rein seemed to vanish, and I felt his breath on the back of my neck with the next few words he spoke. "Now is not the time." At that instance I felt an enourmous impact in the middle of my back. It sent me flying up into the air, spinning rather rapidly as I ascended. I threw the weight of my arms and legs in the opposite direction of my rotation, in order to stop the spiral I had been thrown into, and as I did I surveyed the area I could see for Rein, but didn't see him. I brought my legs down, forcing my torso up, and rotating me about my center of gravity to a point when my feet hit the ground. As they did I pushed myself back up, spinning onehundred and eighty degrees in the air to see the area behind me, half expecting Rein to be inches from my face, but I didn't see him. Only the gaping whole in the side of the organization building we had left through, and baren desert. I laded, and istantly snapped to a defensive position. One hand out in front of me palm facing forward, and fingers close together, the other resting ever so slightly on the handle of my blade at my side. I built energy in my outrestched arm, waiting for Rein to again attack from nowhere. Just as I thought after a moment I heard Rein again whispering behind me. "Too slow." Only this time when he lashed out his attack it hit not me, but the thin layer of energy I had around me. As he made contact I turned about my left foot, biringing my outstretched arm down to my side, and then forcing back up and too Reins chest as I rotated. My palm made cotact, and with a small burst of energy from my palm Rein went flying. I lept into the air after him, pulling my sword from it's sheath as I did, readying for my first true attack. As We both flew through the air I saw Rein again set his hands into motion, and after a split second he pulled one hand away, and his sword seemed to materialize into it's grasp from nowhere. He used his blade, and readied himself for the impact so soon coming. I too redied myself, bracing my empty hand on the back of my blade, and begining to build energy with it. Our blades made cotact with a fury of sparks, pushing Rein away from me a bit in the air, and as he slowly sailed away he pulled his sword back readying to swing at me. I let loose a violent beam of energy from my hand, a green so bright that I could barely keep my eyes open long enough to see it send Rein flying down into the dirt.I sailed over him, a ways, and then leaned forward, flipping myself over head first, noting that he was still on the ground as I faced that direction, and then finishing my flip, landing facing away form him in a slighlty inclined breakfall position. Though I was leaned so far back that I would have normally fallen to the ground, the forward momentum was so much that I was fighting not to flip forward. After a moment My momentum slowed, and I leveled myself out, digging my right foot into the ground a bit, using my last bit of momentum to spin myself around. Rein was a fair distance away from me now, but still on the ground, and I wasn't going to give him the chance to get back up. I placed both hands on the handle of my sword, and poured energy into the blade I moved the blade so that it was trailing behind me, and took off toward our "Leader" in all his monstrous glory, intending to do my best to cleave him in half when I got to him. Flying through the air however I realized this was just too easy. Rein didn't have a single mark visible across his body, and I then noticed he was laying on top of both of his hands, keeping them out of sight. I only barly had enough time to pull my blade up in front of me before a few violent flashes of violet energy flew up from the ground, missing me by only inches. I still kept my heading toward Rein, whom was still looking down at the dirt he landed in, and missing by mere inches slowly closing on me. I looked up as one of the flashes as it exploded from the ground, and it ended at a spire much much higher than I could possibly jump, and from some of the holes I had passed by the spires were coming from pretty far underground. I just puched forward, hoping to make it to Rein before one of these monstrous towers hit me. I jumped left, and right, watching as the spires trailed me, Then I felt it. The ground shook violently under me, and I knew what was coming. I lep up as high as I could, hoping to some how make it higher than the tower that would soon be following me up. That's when I saw him, Rein was floating, just above where his towers were ending, both his hands in motion, pulling energy from the earth. I looked back down and saw what I thought was Rein, and realized how stupid I was, walking right into his trap.


Last edited by ultimate_cloud on Fri Apr 04, 2008 9:42 am; edited 6 times in total
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The_entropic_engineer
Dwelf
The_entropic_engineer


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue2/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (2/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptyFri Feb 15, 2008 7:45 am

You can't stop here. Your like the producer of Assaisians Creed. If you do.
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ultimate_cloud
Ninja
ultimate_cloud


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue3/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (3/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptyFri Feb 15, 2008 11:33 am

It's not where I'm really stopping, it's just where I stopped for now until I get quite a bit more written, then I'll post more. You liked it I take it?
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Ethanthecrazy
The Lord of Epic
Ethanthecrazy


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue4/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (4/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptySat Mar 01, 2008 3:18 am

Wow , that was amazing. Really good writing. It started out rough at first, but it picked up at the end. My biggest problem is that the desriptive style seems peculiar for the kind of writing your doing. Sorry, but i don't know how you would fix. At the time of the post, i have added more to Coming Home Again.
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ultimate_cloud
Ninja
ultimate_cloud


Posts : 621
Points : 6340
Join date : 2007-10-21

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Rank: Lord of Dexterity
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A random story. Left_bar_bleue3/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (3/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptySun Mar 02, 2008 8:00 pm

I kinded of wanted to take an over secritptive stlye on this story. At times it is a little over kill I admit, and it's something I'll fix in a bit, but it is always going to be really descriptive.
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Ethanthecrazy
The Lord of Epic
Ethanthecrazy


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue4/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (4/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptySun Mar 02, 2008 10:09 pm

Ok, its just a bit weird, bit if it is intentional, its cool.
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Ethanthecrazy
The Lord of Epic
Ethanthecrazy


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A random story. Left_bar_bleue4/10A random story. Empty_bar_bleue  (4/10)

A random story. Empty
PostSubject: Re: A random story.   A random story. EmptyMon Dec 07, 2009 11:54 pm

Yah, " i wont be stopping here." I call bull on that.
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A random story. Empty
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